Dunder Mifflin, Inc.Best Office Lines

Body Language

Vol. 6 · Issue 21Scranton, PA

Michael thinks Donna is sending him signals, leading to a PowerPoint presentation you have to read to believe. You'll find every line from the episode right here, including Jim and Pam's first joint sale and Kelly's quest for a minority executive spot. It's the complete script for anyone wondering if those eyes really were Shrek-green.

Scene 01

3 lines
Michael Scott
Buenos dias, Erin.
Erin Hannon
Buenos dias, Miguel. (phone rings) Hello, Dunder-Mifflin.
Michael Scott
No, no, no, no. Solamente en espanol, por favor.

Scene 02

1 line
Michael Scott
I believe that every man, woman, and child in this country should learn how to speak Spanish. They are our neighbors to the South, and this would be a healing thing for... for all of North America. And... I am going on vacation next week to Cancun.

Scene 03

4 lines
Michael Scott
Buenos dias, Jaime.
Jim Halpert
Buenos dias, Miguel. Como estas? Bien? Claro que si! Yo estoy fantastico. Que pasa?
Michael Scott
Ha ha! Buenos dias, Dwight!
Dwight Schrute
Guten tag, Herr Michael.

Scene 04

1 line
Dwight Schrute
I don't understand why Michael is wasting his time with Spanish. I have it on very good authority that within 20 years, everyone will be speaking German. Or a Chinese-German hybrid.

Scene 05

2 lines
Michael Scott
La telefona.
Oscar Martinez
El telefono.

Scene 06

1 line
Oscar Martinez
Michael's having a hard time with the gender part of Spanish. So I told him to mark everything with the international symbol for gender. And, um... (holds up two blurred-out drawings of male and female genitalia) I should have been more specific.

Scene 07

7 lines
Oscar Martinez
Your office is full of genitalia.
Michael Scott
(clears throat) Oh. Eso es lo que dice, el!
Oscar Martinez
"That's what he says?"
Michael Scott
Damn it. (knock on door) Ah, Angelo.
Angela Martin
Angela. (Michael sticks post-it on Angela's forehead with female genitalia) Michael.
Michael Scott
Yo soy Cancun.
Angela Martin
(removes post-it, leaves) Uhh!

Scene 08

8 lines
Jim Halpert
All right, so I'll finish up on bulk pricing, and then you go into delivery guarantee.
Pam Beesly
You know, maybe there's an opportunity for a joke there, like, um... like, (vaudeville delivery) "I just delivered a baby. They didn't offer me a guarantee."
Jim Halpert
Yeah, or maybe we don't even need that.
Michael Scott
Can you smell the power of the Halperts? Power couple.
Dwight Schrute
You know what? I should be getting this client, Michael. My numbers are better than either of theirs.
Michael Scott
I went with the people I thought would put the best face on the company.
Dwight Schrute
If you want people to put the best face on something, why would you get two people who probably never cut the face off of anything in their lives?
Jim Halpert
(whispers) That's a good point.

Scene 09

5 lines
Pam Beesly
This is our first joint sales pitch. I think we're gonna work really well together.
Jim Halpert
Yeah I think we have complimentary strengths. We understand each other.
Pam Beesly
We have good give and take. (vaudeville delivery) I give, he takes.
Jim Halpert
(whispering) I don't even know who you are anymore.
Pam Beesly
(vaudeville delivery) Yee.

Scene 10

7 lines
Donna
Hi, uh, Donna Newton, here to see Michael Scott.
Jim Halpert
Oh, hey, Miss Newton. Hi, I'm Jim.
Donna
Hi!
Jim Halpert
How are you?
Michael Scott
Did somebody order a hooker over here?
Donna
(laughing) Oh, stop that.
Michael Scott
Hi. How are you?

Scene 11

1 line
Michael Scott
There's this woman I met a few weeks ago. Her name is Donna, the manager of Sid & Dexter's and, right now, we're in the midst of a passionate love affair. Um, no. But she is coming by today. Maybe to buy some printers, so...

Scene 12

7 lines
Michael Scott
Right here, we have the wonder twins, Jim and Pam Halpert. They will be assisting you today.
Donna
You look exactly alike.
Pam Beesly
Oh, no we're actually married. We're not brother and sister.
Donna
I have a sense about these things.
Jim Halpert
All right.
Donna
You have some ancestors in common... somewhere back.
Angela Martin
I knew it. You should see their baby.

Scene 13

10 lines
Jim Halpert
(explaining PowerPoint to Donna) So, yes, laser printers are more expensive. But they cost less to operate (knocking) So it's a tradeoff.
Michael Scott
(barges in) Hi.
Jim Halpert
Hold on one second.
Michael Scott
Sorry to interrupt. Sorry to interrupt. Do you, Donna, by any chance shop at Victoria's Secret?
Jim Halpert
What?
Michael Scott
Because I keep getting these magazines sent to me via the address of the woman who used to live in my condo before me.
Jim Halpert
None of this is time sensitive.
Michael Scott
Uh, yes, uh, the sale is on now through May.
Donna
Oh, yeah, thank you.
Michael Scott
Okay, I have more of them.

Scene 14

15 lines
Gabe Lewis
You would have weekly conference calls with executives in corporate. A two-week training program at the Yale school of management, obviously you would be high on the list for advancement opportunities.
Darryl Philbin
Sounds all right.
Dwight Schrute
What is this?
Gabe Lewis
Oh, this is "Print in All Colors," Sabre's minority executive training program.
Dwight Schrute
It doesn't just sound a'ight, it sounds amazing.
Darryl Philbin
I didn't say "a'ight."
Dwight Schrute
How do I apply?
Gabe Lewis
You have to be a minority.
Dwight Schrute
Uh, glasses wearers. Cholera survivors. Geniuses. Non-organic family farmers. The list goes on and on. You want me to keep going?
Gabe Lewis
Those don't really count. We're thinking more ethnic and racial minorities.
Dwight Schrute
Come here. Come here.
Gabe Lewis
Hmm?
Dwight Schrute
Ten seconds ago, this guy was driving a forklift. Okay? Now all off a sudden he's Cinderella of the office. What are you guys thinking?
Gabe Lewis
Well...
Darryl Philbin
I like the sound of this. (looks at Dwight) Maybe one day I'll be sitting in Michael's chair. Wouldn't that be something?

Scene 15

1 line
Dwight Schrute
One minority from this branch is going to get into this program. Who would I refer? Hmm... the competent, hardworking one who does things his own way, or the malleable simpleton who can be bought for a few fashion magazines?

Scene 16

14 lines
Kelly Kapoor
(on phone) This is the second time that you've sent me the wrong size. I mean, I know what a four feels like. I've been a four my whole life. You know what? You can go to Hell. All right? Thanks for nothing.
Dwight Schrute
Oh, man. White people, right?
Kelly Kapoor
I don't know if she was white.
Dwight Schrute
Well, you can kinda tell from the voice.
Kelly Kapoor
Yeah.
Dwight Schrute
I bet you get pulled over by the cops a lot, just because of your race.
Kelly Kapoor
Well, they say it's because of texting, but maybe you're right.
Dwight Schrute
I think you should consider applying for the executive minority training program.
Kelly Kapoor
Never thought of myself as an executive before.
Dwight Schrute
I know, 'cause you have no role models. How many Indian CEO's can you think of?
Kelly Kapoor
I can't think of any CEO's, any race.
Dwight Schrute
You could be the Indian Bill Gates. You could be the Indian Ted Turner.
Kelly Kapoor
I could be the Indian Julia Roberts.
Dwight Schrute
That's not... she's... okay. Yes.

Scene 17

4 lines
Michael Scott
I took the liberty to scan a few things earlier, and I want to show you... there we go! (Michael's picture pops up on the PowerPoint screen) Whoa, look at those vivid colors. Look at my eyes. Those are Shrek-green eyes. That is me again. I think this displays the crisp, dazzling white.
Donna
Mm-hmm.
Michael Scott
And that would be a display (image from a catalog of a man wearing only white boxers pops up) of the crisp, gorgeous black.
Donna
Yeah.

Scene 18

1 line
Michael Scott
It's subtle. That's how it works. I show her an image that turns her on. And then she looks at me, then back at me, then back at the image. Soon, she doesn't know what is me, what is the image. She just knows that she's turned on.

Scene 19

11 lines
Michael Scott
This is a place that I like to go to be alone with my thoughts. I've never taken anybody there before.
Donna
Who took the photo?
Michael Scott
Ryan.
Donna
Oh. (Michael quickly advances PowerPoint show to last slide which is "SEX" in bold white letters on a black background and then exits the show quickly)
Michael Scott
And that's it. That's me. That's who I am.
Donna
(giggles) Not bad.
Michael Scott
Oh, thanks. (softly) You're not bad, either.
Donna
Thank you. (Michael tries t kiss Donna, Donna clears throat) Hmm.
Michael Scott
Hmm.
Donna
Oh my God. (realizing Jim and Pam are looking through the conference room windows)
Michael Scott
Jim! Could you come in here for a sec? What was that printer we were looking at?

Scene 20

7 lines
Michael Scott
(in his office) You didn't see it, Pam. She was giving me all sorts of signals that she wanted me to make a move. Shortbread?
Jim Halpert
No.
Pam Beesly
I'll have one.
Jim Halpert
Well, maybe you shouldn't try to kiss people at work.
Michael Scott
Oh really, Jim? What about Pam? And you did a heck of a lot more than kiss. Maybe this could be my Pam.
Jim Halpert
Okay. Well, all that is irrelevant.
Pam Beesly
Maybe Michael has a point. I mean, if she was really that upset, she wouldn't still be here.

Scene 21

1 line
Donna
Was it professional? No. But I work in the nightlife industry. I get hit on all the time. In my 20's it would have been annoying. In my late 20's, I find it really flattering.

Scene 22

3 lines
Michael Scott
Look, I know that I screwed up in there. I know that I probably messed up your sale. I just want to go in and fix it.
Pam Beesly
What if I back out and you finish the pitch with Jim?
Jim Halpert
What?

Scene 23

6 lines
Jim Halpert
What was that?
Pam Beesly
Just let him flirt with her. People meet each other all sorts of ways.
Jim Halpert
Pam, you know he's not gonna get anywhere, and he's gonna blow our sale.
Pam Beesly
Who cares? (Michael peeking at them through his office window) It's not that huge a sale.
Jim Halpert
Hey, the Schwab guy told us to treat every sale like it was a huge sale.
Pam Beesly
Don't act like you understood anything that guy said. (pat's Jim's arm) Good luck, wingman. (salutes)

Scene 24

6 lines
Dwight Schrute
How as being a minority affected you?
Kelly Kapoor
Well, there's a lot of pressure from my parents to settle down and marry an Indian guy.
Dwight Schrute
Oh, good, and you resent this because...
Kelly Kapoor
Indian guys always wear their cell phones outside their pants. It's so dorky.
Dwight Schrute
Oh, no, no. That's not dorky. (Dwight wears his phone like that) Look, it's easily accessible. Boom, like this. 911, hello. Scranton Strangler's in the house. Inside the house.
Kelly Kapoor
Just put it in your pocket.

Scene 25

7 lines
Michael & Donna
(indistinct chatter inside conference room)
Kevin Malone
(looking it) Look at that. She's totally flirting with him.
Phyllis Vance
You don't know that. Some people can't help oozing sexuality.
Creed Bratton
You ever notice you can ooze two things: sexuality and pus. Man, I tell ya.
Phyllis Vance
She just crossed her arms together... that's bad.
Pam Beesly
Maybe she's just pushing her breasts together to make them look bigger.
Kevin Malone
(tries it by crossing his arms) Like that? (to Andy)

Scene 26

9 lines
Donna
Is this... is this the best you can do right there?
Jim Halpert
Uh, for that printer, yes. Unfortunately we don't have a lot of flexibility.
Donna
Oh. Well, I guess I'm just used to the restaurant business, (removes sweater revealing her revealing top) where, if you're in charge, then you can always get discounts for the people that you like.
Jim Halpert
Yeah. (chuckles)
Michael Scott
So maybe we could find a little wiggle room, right?
Jim Halpert
What's that?
Michael Scott
Maybe wee find some wiggle room?
Jim Halpert
I don't... I don't think so.
Michael Scott
I think we could. (Donna giggles)

Scene 27

7 lines
Oscar Martinez
I don't see how we could possibly sell these for that little without losing money. Delivery alone will cost...
Michael Scott
Okay, well sometimes... sometimes it makes financial sense to lose money, right? Like for tax purposes.
Oscar Martinez
Actually, ran the numbers on this, and in this case, it makes more financial sense to gain money.
Michael Scott
Why don't you run them again?
Jim Halpert
What if she's just flirting with you to get a better price?
Michael Scott
If she is, it's working.
Kevin Malone
Yeah, Michael, here's a trick. Ask her if she wants a mint. If she says "no," then she is not interested.

Scene 28

6 lines
Jim Halpert
She does not like him.
Pam Beesly
You can flirt with someone to get what you want and also be attracted to them. How do you think we got together?
Jim Halpert
'cause I stopped by your desk like 15 times a day.
Pam Beesly
I was after your money.
Jim Halpert
Well, the joke was on you.
Pam Beesly
Yes, it was.

Scene 29

14 lines
Kelly Kapoor
(typing) Can you stop micromanaging? I know how to do this.
Ryan Howard
Okay...
Dwight Schrute
Hey... what are you guys doing?
Kelly Kapoor
This girl was really rude to me at the mall. So I created a fake I.M. account from a hot guy at her high school, and now I'm trying to make her anorexic.
Ryan Howard
Tell her everyone in home room thinks she's fat.
Kelly Kapoor
Oh, that is so good.
Dwight Schrute
You know, we really should keep practicing for this interview.
Kelly Kapoor
Oh, that's okay. Ryan coached me.
Dwight Schrute
Ryan? What does he know?
Ryan Howard
It's easy... you just turn every question around on them. Do you think you're treated differently because of your race?
Kelly Kapoor
Would you ask that same question if I was white? We're so in.
Dwight Schrute
"We?"
Kelly Kapoor
When I become executive, I'm gonna make Ryan manager.
Ryan Howard
And then the two of us are cleanin' house.

Scene 30

1 line
Dwight Schrute
Kelly will be even worse than Darryl. If you'd have told me this morning that today I'd be creating a monster capable f my own destruction, I 'd have thought you were referring to the bull Mose and I are trying to reanimate.

Scene 31

10 lines
Michael Scott
So corporate approval of this contract is contingent upon buyer and seller...
Donna
Mm-hmm.
Michael Scott
Operating blahdy blahdy blah. Boilerplate. Pound of fish. (Donna laughing) Just kidding. Do you like mints?
Donna
Yes.
Michael Scott
I carry mints with me sometimes. You ever tried those?
Donna
Oh, I haven't tried those. No.
Michael Scott
They're good (Donna grabs mint)
Donna
You want one?
Michael Scott
Sure.
Donna
It's like cool... "certified cool." I like how they say "certified." Like there's some consortium of... (Michael grabs the mint from Donna's hand with his mouth, Donna pulls her hand away) Michael!

Scene 32

20 lines
Michael Scott
I can't stop myself from kissing her.
Kevin Malone
Yeah, now you know how I feel sitting next to those M&M's all day.
Andy Bernard
Well, why don't you just move the M&M's?
Kevin Malone
Well, why don't you shut up!
Michael Scott
Okay, guys, guys, guys. Just tell me it's not totally insane to try one more time.
Jim Halpert
It is totally insane.
Oscar Martinez
Michael, he's right. You are turning into a stalker.
Michael Scott
Okay. What do you think?
Kevin Malone
I think it's over, man.
Michael Scott
Andy?
Andy Bernard
Ehh.
Michael Scott
Okay, some for, some against.
Jim Halpert
Nobody's for.
Michael Scott
Pam?
Pam Beesly
Hmm?
Michael Scott
What do you think?
Pam Beesly
Um... I think it's really, really unlikely.
Jim Halpert
Okay.
Pam Beesly
Really unlikely. But I can't say that it's impossible.
Jim Halpert
What?

Scene 33

1 line
Pam Beesly
I'm not saying she's in love with him. But she could have left a while ago. Most printer sales are done over the phone, Ms. Boob shirt.

Scene 34

8 lines
Michael Scott
I'm going with Pam's group.
Jim Halpert
Wait.
Michael Scott
Here we go.
Jim Halpert
Michael. Michael.
Michael Scott
Okay.
Jim Halpert
Michael.
Michael Scott
No, guys, guys, guys. Guys, just... thank you for talking. Wish me luck.
Jim Halpert
No.

Scene 35

1 line
Michael Scott
What sort of movie would Rudy have been if he had just stopped, given up, after two rejections? Would have been a lot shorter. Probably been a lot funnier. But it would have ultimately been a disappointment. I still would have seen it, but that's not... the point.

Scene 36

6 lines
Dwight Schrute
Kelly is disqualified!
Gabe Lewis
What?
Dwight Schrute
You said the program is not open to Caucasians. Well... anthropologically, she is Indian. Indians migrated from the caucuses region of Europe. Therefore, technically, she is Caucasian. You're welcome, America.
Gabe Lewis
Yeah, but she's not white, though.
Dwight Schrute
Well, obviously, she is brownish. But come on, I mean, Darryl is far more ethnic.
Gabe Lewis
Darryl withdrew his application. He said the Yale program interfered with his softball league, you know? He's gone.

Scene 37

1 line
Darryl Philbin
I got my whole life to be a minority executive. I only have about a year left in these knees, though.

Scene 38

9 lines
Dwight Schrute
Kelly is the only applicant.
Gabe Lewis
Yeah, unless somebody else applies today.
Kelly Kapoor
Namaste.
Dwight Schrute
Oh, dear God. Okay. Don't make any decisions just yet. Okay? I'll be right back.
Kelly Kapoor
Hello.
Gabe Lewis
That's very nice. (referring to Kelly's bindi) I never noticed that before.
Kelly Kapoor
Sometimes my bangs cover it.
Gabe Lewis
Yeah. I don't want to be offensive but, uh... may I ask you what that means?
Kelly Kapoor
I do find that offensive, actually.

Scene 39

23 lines
Michael Scott
We should have your contract done by Thursday.
Donna
Oh, great. Great, I will look out for that stuff, then.
Michael Scott
Okay.
Donna
And, um... you know I just wanted to say it was really... really nice to do business with you.
Michael Scott
Yeah it was nice to do business with you, too.
Donna
Thank you. Did I... get everything?
Michael Scott
I don't know. I think so.
Donna
Yeah, I think so.
Michael Scott
(whispers) Okay. So... Oh, Donna?
Donna
Yeah? Do you need validation? We don't... we don't validate.
Donna
No, it's just in the lot, so...
Michael Scott
Thank you so much.
Donna
You're welcome. (they hug) You're... welcome.
Michael Scott
Mmm. (Donna giggles)
Donna
Bye.
Michael Scott
(follows her out of office) Ahem. So, um... okay, if you have... if there's any other questions that you have...
Donna
I don't have, uh, any other questions. (blind clanking as she leans against door to prevent from Michael kissing her) I'm just gonna... make my way down to...
Michael Scott
All right. All right. Bye.
Donna
Bye-bye!
Michael Scott
And have a good elevator ride.
Donna
Okay.
Michael Scott
Oh, what's that out there?
Kevin Malone
Michael, how did it go? (Michael goes in his office and closes door)

Scene 40

12 lines
Dwight Schrute
How would one of you feel if I told you I could put you on a fast track to an executive position at this company?
Erin Hannon
Holy cow. I'd be so happy.
Dwight Schrute
I wasn't talking to you, pale-face.
Erin Hannon
I know. I meant I'd be happy for them.
Dwight Schrute
What I'm offering is a ticket on a bullet train straight to middle management.
Stanley Hudson
Dwight, I know these programs. "Every color is important because, together, we make a rainbow."
Dwight Schrute
Yes.
Stanley Hudson
I'll slap you in the face with a rainbow.
Erin Hannon
Mm!
Dwight Schrute
Speaking of rainbows, Oscar... you are kind of a double minority. Gay. So we at Sabre could really benefit from your perspective.
Oscar Martinez
Dwight, we know Kelly applied. We're not gonna cross her. No matter how good the program is.
Dwight Schrute
I can protect you from Kelly. (Erin stifles laugh) Will you get out of here? Seriously. (Erin turns and leaves kitchen)

Scene 41

10 lines
Kelly Kapoor
For hobbies, um, yoga, belly dancing, snake charming. Beds of nails. I like lying on them.
Dwight Schrute
Whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa! This is Hide Toshi Hasagawa. He would like to apply for the Sabre minority executive training program "print in all colors" initiative.
Kelly Kapoor
Dwight: What are you doing?
Dwight Schrute
Helping heal America in a dramatic fashion in the 11th hour.
Kelly Kapoor
God, I hate you so much! (gets up, leaves)
Dwight Schrute
Caucasians, am I right? (to Hide) Have a seat. I'll translate.
Hide
Why? I don't need translator.
Dwight Schrute
You don't know what you need. Just...
Gabe Lewis
Well, uh... why don't you just tell me a little about yourself, Hide.
Hide
In Japan, heart surgeon, number one. Steady hand.

Scene 42

25 lines
Pam Beesly
Hey, Michael. (Michael is sitting on couch outside his office) How you doing?
Michael Scott
I don't know. I don't know. Can't really trust my feelings anymore.
Pam Beesly
You know what, Michael? For what it's worth... I was wrong, too. I thought she was interested in you.
Michael Scott
She suckered you too.
Pam Beesly
Mm-hmm.
Michael Scott
Was it the cleavage?
Pam Beesly
Yeah, and the shoulder cutouts.
Michael Scott
Yep.
Phyllis Vance
Michael, you know, it's easy to get fooled. Bob's warehouse guys flirt with me all the time. It... it's mostly harmless. Usually I don't let it go too far.
Andy Bernard
You know, when I tore my scrote, I was, uh... I was seeing this really hot urologist about it, and thought she was into me. But now I think she was just doing a bunch of stuff to bill my HMO. You know, she's touching around down there. It's easy to get confused.
Erin Hannon
Michael, I think Donna left this here. Should I put it in the lost and found for 14 days and then I can take it home?
Michael Scott
God. She left this here?
Erin Hannon
Yeah.
Michael Scott
Okay. Maybe she wants me to return this to her at her work.
Jim Halpert
What?
Everyone
No.
Michael Scott
Yeah. This could be a signal. People don't just take barrettes off.
Oscar Martinez
It's not a signal. It's just a coincidence. No, it's not even a coincidence. It's just something that happened.
Pam Beesly
Michael...
Michael Scott
(hold up barrette) Well...
Pam Beesly
She doesn't want you to return the barrette. She's not interested in you.
Michael Scott
Yeah, I know. I know.
Pam Beesly
I'm sorry.
Michael Scott
I know. You're right. Thank you. Thanks everybody. (waves, returns to his office, clears throat, turns around and runs out of office)
Pam Beesly
Michael! (sighs)

Scene 43

3 lines
Michael Scott
(runs down to parking lot, sighs)
Donna
(still in parking lot sitting in her car) Michael!
Michael Scott
Oh. You're still here. I have your baguette.

Scene 44

1 line
Gabe Lewis
Everyone, it is my pleasure to announce our newest member of the Sabre minority executive training program. Kelly Rajnigandha Kapoor. (clapping) All right.

Scene 45

1 line
Gabe Lewis
They're going to be pretty pleased in Tallahassee that I snagged an Indian for the program. She'll be the first. The program's mostly black. It's almost too black. That didn't sound right.

Scene 46

10 lines
Kelly Kapoor
(puts a bindi on Erin's forehead) And the best part is is that I get a business stipend to buy all new clothes. So you can totally buy any of my old clothes that I'm not gonna need anymore.
Erin Hannon
Oh, my God, thank you so much. I love that denim jumpsuit you have. How much?
Kelly Kapoor
Oh. Actually I was thinking about clothes that I was just gonna give to Goodwill anyway.
Erin Hannon
Great.
Dwight Schrute
Hey, kiddo. Congratulations are in order. You deserve it. (Dwight extends his hand, but Kelly hugs him)
Kelly Kapoor
Thank you, Dwight.
Dwight Schrute
Oh.
Kelly Kapoor
I'll never forget everything that you've done for me.
Dwight Schrute
Gosh. He he.
Kelly Kapoor
Because I never forget anything.

Scene 47

1 line
Dwight Schrute
Just once, I would like to be a puppet master and have nothing go wrong. Is that too much to ask?

Scene 48

9 lines
Michael Scott
You know what? Everybody told me that you weren't interested. Everybody. And I didn't believe 'em. And they were right. So... there's your barrette.
Donna
No, y-you were... right.
Michael Scott
Who?
Donna
You were right.
Michael Scott
About what?
Donna
You were right. (Michael leans into Donna's car to kiss her and they kiss passionately) I'm sorry.
Michael Scott
No, no. No.
Donna
I'm sor...
Michael Scott
No... (they kiss again)

Scene 49

6 lines
Michael Scott
(returns to office) What happened?
Erin Hannon
Kelly got into the minority training program.
Michael Scott
Really?! Oh, that's great. That's such good news. I did it! (all look at him) I kissed. We kissed.
Kevin Malone
Ooh.
Phyllis Vance
Oh, Michael.
Michael Scott
No, I'm serious. It... this happened. I went down to the parking lot and I was... I returned her barrette (holds up barrette) We ki... We did. Okay. We did. We did.

Scene 50

1 line
Michael Scott
You know what? It doesn't matter. Because I know it happened. And that is all that counts. (shouts) I did do it!