Scene 017 linesErin HannonOpen quote: They're back!Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Oooh yeah... (people chuckle) Jim and Pam!Kelly KapoorOpen quote: How was Puerto Rico? Was it so romantic?Jim HalpertOpen quote: It was.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: It really was.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Really was.Kelly KapoorOpen quote: (voice cracks) I'm so happy for you...
Scene 024 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: Puerto Rico was awesome.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh my gosh. The honeymoon was great. We met this other couple at the resort, Frank and Benny. We hung out with them a lot.Jim HalpertOpen quote: (goofy voice) Frank and Beans. (laughs) Always makes her laugh.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (goofy voice) Frank and beans!
Scene 0311 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: Is there someone there? Who is there? I hear voices, is somebody there?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Yeah!Michael ScottOpen quote: Is someone there? I can't see you because I'm blind.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Its Jim and Pam, Michael.Michael ScottOpen quote: (gasps) It is?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Yeah...Michael ScottOpen quote: They're back? Oh! Oh! Oh, Pam! (reaching out with hands at chest level)Jim HalpertOpen quote: Nope.Michael ScottOpen quote: And oh, Jim...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Hi, Michael.Michael ScottOpen quote: Oh, I haven't see you since my accident that I had when I fell- I fell into the pool of acid, eyes first. Blind guy.
Scene 041 lineMichael ScottOpen quote: Blind-guy McSqueezy. How do I describe it? It is a character I've been workshopping whose lack of vision gets him into all sorts of trouble. The women in my improve class absolutely hate him. (groans)
Scene 057 linesMeredith PalmerOpen quote: So what'd you bring us?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Some candy.Meredith PalmerOpen quote: What else?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: That's it.Meredith PalmerOpen quote: Oh, 'cause you spent so much on the wedding.Michael ScottOpen quote: (behind Pam, acting out blind-guy, groaning)Pam BeeslyOpen quote: It's good to be home.
Scene 065 linesDwight SchruteOpen quote: This conversation has two items on the agenda.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Do we have a conversation scheduled?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Number one, do not leave your things on my desk. It's not some kind of personal pen receptacle for you. I don't care how high they promote you, which brings me to item number two... I never formally congratulated you on your promotion, so I'd just like to say... (high voice, holding up wooden mallard) con-quack-ulations!Jim HalpertOpen quote: Wow, that's... really thoughtful of you, Dwight, thank you.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (duck voice) You're welcome! (quacks, laughs)
Scene 071 lineDwight SchruteOpen quote: I inserted a listening device into the belly of the mallard. Now I can observe Jim, trap Jim, and destroy Jim, just like in the Bavarian fairy tale. Only this time, the mallard skins the toad alive. And of course in this version you lose the whole veiled critique of the Kaiser thing.
Scene 083 linesDwight SchruteOpen quote: I'm sorry to have been bugging you all these years.Jim HalpertOpen quote: It's a real handsome duck.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Mallard. Okay, I'll get out of your hair.
Scene 0910 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: Hey!Erin HannonOpen quote: Hi!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Uh, we brought back some Puerto Rican candy.Erin HannonOpen quote: Coco Leche! That's my favorite!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Awesome! I'll leave it up here so everyone can enjoy it.Erin HannonOpen quote: Oh, um, let me just check with Michael first.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (laughs) I think it'll be okay.Erin HannonOpen quote: (laughs) I think it will too, but I'll just check with him, though.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Great.Erin HannonOpen quote: Oops, sorry. (slides candy back to Pam) Oops.
Scene 1033 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: I have recently taken a lover.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Well, that's great. Congratulations. Who's the lucky lady?Michael ScottOpen quote: Pam's mom.Jim HalpertOpen quote: What?Michael ScottOpen quote: Pam's mom, Helene. Remember from your wedding?Jim HalpertOpen quote: You're messing with me.Michael ScottOpen quote: About what?Jim HalpertOpen quote: You did not have sex with Pam's mom.Michael ScottOpen quote: Oh, big time.Jim HalpertOpen quote: What kind of car does she drive?Michael ScottOpen quote: She drives a green camry.Jim HalpertOpen quote: (expletive)Michael ScottOpen quote: And the seats go all the way down. All the way down.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Oh my God. (Michael bangs the table) Oh my God.Michael ScottOpen quote: (laughs) What?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Okay, never tell Pam, and secondly-Michael ScottOpen quote: Okay, good, a pact. A pact. Although I may have to break it tonight when Helene and I tell Pam over dinner. You alright?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Oh my God.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: (walks in) Hey, Jim.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Not now, Toby, my God!Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Oh, Jesus!Michael ScottOpen quote: Get the hell out of here, idiot.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: What did I do?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Okay, as far as dinner tonight, cancel that, and please, for both our sakes, never, ever, ever see her again.Michael ScottOpen quote: I think you're underestimating Pam. I think more than anything, she wants me to be happy.Jim HalpertOpen quote: No, not more than anything.Michael ScottOpen quote: Okay, I have a good thing with the mom-Jim HalpertOpen quote: Don't call her "the mom."Michael ScottOpen quote: She's right on my way home from work.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Then take a different way home, man!Michael ScottOpen quote: I di- alright, I'll take surface streets, its- the last thing in the world I would want to do is upset Pam.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Okay, so we're good.Michael ScottOpen quote: Yeah.
Scene 114 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: Can you change my dinner reservations from four people to two?Erin HannonOpen quote: Sure. Oh, is it okay if I put out some candy that Pam brought back from Puerto Rico?Michael ScottOpen quote: Sure. Thanks for asking.Erin HannonOpen quote: Pam, we're all set. (Pam places candy on Erin's desk) Yum.
Scene 127 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: Frank and beans!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Frank and beans! (both laugh) So what'd we decide for Michael, the bottle of rum, or the seashell alarm clock?Jim HalpertOpen quote: You know what? Can I have the weekend to decide?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Bottle of rum it is. (takes package out of bag) Alright, shall we?Jim HalpertOpen quote: You know what, I am really slammed, trying to catch up on everything here and I know that Michael's slammed too. So, maybe we should do this when things are a little less crazy.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Come on, it'll take two seconds.Jim HalpertOpen quote: No, it- (high-pitched feedback as Jim starts to leave, feedback changes as he moves, turns over the mallard to see the listening devics, sighs, places mallard back on the desk)
Scene 1336 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: (unwraps rum gift) Oh, wow.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (giggles)Michael ScottOpen quote: That is amazing. I feel like a real Puerto Rican.Erin HannonOpen quote: Michael, you're all set at Botticelli's. I changed the reservation to two people.Michael ScottOpen quote: Erin, look. (holds up parrot rum bottle)Erin HannonOpen quote: Fun!Michael ScottOpen quote: Yeah.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Wow, Botticelli's, that sounds like a special occasion.Michael ScottOpen quote: Yeah, no, it's nobody.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (laughs) I don't know. I think Michael has a date.Michael ScottOpen quote: (chuckles) Hmm... no.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (laughs) I think you have a date.Michael ScottOpen quote: I don't.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Come on.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Uh, I think we should just drop it... 'cause obviously he doesn't want to talk about it.Michael ScottOpen quote: (sighs) I don't deserve this, guys.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes, you do.Michael ScottOpen quote: No, I don't.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Just take the parrot.Michael ScottOpen quote: (long exhale)Jim HalpertOpen quote: Okay, back to the old grind.Michael ScottOpen quote: I was probably going to break up with her anyway.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh, that's too bad.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Don't-Michael ScottOpen quote: Pam, it is very complicated. There are a lot of moving parts here.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Sounds complicated.Michael ScottOpen quote: It is.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Yeah, but I mean, if you really like this person, then you should see where it goes.Michael ScottOpen quote: You want me to be happy?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Of course.Michael ScottOpen quote: Part of the problem is, she is the mother of a close friend of mine.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh.Michael ScottOpen quote: More than a friend, a co-worker.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh! Gossip, who is it? Who is it? Who is it, Michael? ...Who?Michael ScottOpen quote: It's okay.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: No, no, no, no, no. Oh, no. Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Nooooo!
Scene 141 lineMichael ScottOpen quote: That could have gone one of two ways, but I never expected her to get upset.
Scene 158 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: (screams out in the parking lot, Michael watches from his office window)Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (to Michael) You seem tense. Hey, you want me to give you the chills?Michael ScottOpen quote: Okay.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: There's an egg on your head and the yolk is running down, the yolk is running down...Michael ScottOpen quote: (sighs) Feels good.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: There's a knife in your back and the blood is gushing down...Michael ScottOpen quote: I'm sleeping with Pam's mom. Sometimes, dinner.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: ...the blood is gushing down, the blood is gushing down... You know, I really would have appreciated a heads-up that you were into dating mothers. I would have introduced you to mine.
Scene 165 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: (outside, on cell phone) How could you do this to me? He's my boss! How many times have I complained about him to you? No, I am not being dramatic, you are being crazy!Jim HalpertOpen quote: (singsong voice) Who wants a hot chocolate?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Thank you.Jim HalpertOpen quote: (sighs) Oh, so Dwight gave me this wooden mallard as a gift, and I found a recording device in it. Yes. So, I think if I played it just right I can get Dwight to play out the plot of National Treasure.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: You need to be more upset about this. She's your mother too now. Your mother is sleeping with Michael Scott.
Scene 172 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: Andy, can I talk to you for a second?Andy BernardOpen quote: Sure thing, Tuna Boss.
Scene 181 lineJim HalpertOpen quote: (holding up a sign that reads, "Dwight picked the wrong day to put a wooden mallard in my office")
Scene 1911 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: (in Jim's office) How may I be of service to you?Jim HalpertOpen quote: I am gonna need your advice (starts playing loud opera music, everyone can hear it, Creed starts crying) I was thinking about getting this opera for Dwight's birthday, what do you think?Andy BernardOpen quote: (both look at Dwight, Jim waves) This aurea is a joke.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Really?Andy BernardOpen quote: What are you thinking?Jim HalpertOpen quote: I was gonna go with this one.Andy BernardOpen quote: (both look at Dwight who is standing right outside the office) Let me tell you something, if you respect him at all, you will get him something better.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (Andy gets up and leaves the office) The Nard Dog... what was that all about?Andy BernardOpen quote: I know, right?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: What were you talking about in there?Andy BernardOpen quote: Trust me it would only make you mad. (opera continues, Dwight looks at Jim standing outside his office, waves, Jim waves back)
Scene 2057 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: (in the conference room leading a meeting) Due to a certain recent incident, corporate has asked all the branches to come up with ideas as to how we can better communicate with our communities.Andy BernardOpen quote: Is this because of the 60 Minutes segment about working conditions in our Peruvian paper mill?Michael ScottOpen quote: That was a hit job. If you read the Dunder Mifflin press release it clearly states that they had absolutely nothing to do with that particular cancer cluster. So if there is a lesson to be learned here and I'm not sure that there is, it is that in order to help our communities, we need to put other people's needs ahead of our own.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Haha! Ha ha ha.Jim HalpertOpen quote: And whoever comes up with the best idea gets a $50 gift certificate to the restaurant of his or her choice. (everyone claps and makes comments)Michael ScottOpen quote: Who wants to help the world one step at a time? (Dwight raises his hand) Alright, good.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Volunteerism is important. Every weekend I volunteer at the local animal shelter and they need a lot of help down there. Last Sunday I had to put down over 150 pets all by myself.Michael ScottOpen quote: Alright, that's...Meredith PalmerOpen quote: Paint a mural of Chicano leaders.Michael ScottOpen quote: Alright...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: I have a way to make Scranton a better place, you could leave it. (laughter)Michael ScottOpen quote: Okay, I'm out of here, (pretends to leave) see you later guys...VariousOpen quote: Get out and stay out, bye...Michael ScottOpen quote: Ok, oh no here's an idea... conservation...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: I love it, conservation. Let's start by conserving our time and stop having these stupid meetings. (stands up and cheers) No more meetings! No more meetings! No more meetings! No more meetings! (Stanley cheers her on in the background)Michael ScottOpen quote: Anybody else? Who else has an idea?Angela MartinOpen quote: I have some ideas about conservation...Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes! Angela! Please...Michael ScottOpen quote: (Michael leaves to answer his phone) Can you hold down the fort? (on phone) Hey boo!Angela MartinOpen quote: Thank you. Sure well first of all I think that we could totally...Michael ScottOpen quote: (on phone) What's it... why are you crying?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes! I think we should look into that. If you could just speak up louder...Kevin MaloneOpen quote: (to Angela) Shhhh...Angela MartinOpen quote: Well, for our profit...Kevin MaloneOpen quote: (to Angela) Shhh...Michael ScottOpen quote: (on phone) No, no, no, I'll talk to her. I will... No... nobody talks to my baby that way... uh ah... yeah, I'll let you know how it goes. Alright, by pickle.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Who's pickle?Michael ScottOpen quote: (hangs up phone and walks back into conference room) Pamela Morgan Beesly, you need to apologize to your mother right now.Angela MartinOpen quote: I'm sorry, I was told I had the floor.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes.Oscar MartinezOpen quote: Hold on, hold on, what's going on?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Nothing... nothing at all... it's all good!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: I'm not apologizing to anyone. Michael owes me an apology.Michael ScottOpen quote: For trying to find happiness in the arms of a lover?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Don't call my mother your lover.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Yes! That's what I'm talking about.Andy BernardOpen quote: That is not okay dude.Michael ScottOpen quote: Alright, in my defense...Phyllis VanceOpen quote: Disgusting...Creed BrattonOpen quote: She's messed up man...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Yes! Thank you, welcome to my personal hell!Oscar MartinezOpen quote: You have no sense of boundaries Michael.Michael ScottOpen quote: Shut up Oscar. Hey, alright, you know what, clearly I'm outnumbered here, but can I just say one thing, please? What is so wrong about me? I'm caring, I'm generous, I'm sensual. Is it really so horrible that I could possibly go out and find happiness.Phyllis VanceOpen quote: Good luck Michael, I hope you find what you're looking for.Oscar MartinezOpen quote: Maybe you're right, who are we to...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Shut up Oscar. What is wrong with all of you, he is sleeping with my mother!Dwight SchruteOpen quote: I don't think there's a whole lot of sleeping going on.Michael ScottOpen quote: Let's get back to the matter at hand.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Whatever, you know, sleep with my mom, sleep with everybody's mom...Michael ScottOpen quote: No, no, no... no, no...Ryan HowardOpen quote: Whoa, that's my mother you're talking about...Michael ScottOpen quote: I don't like the tone here... this is a place of business, you are to listen to others, you are to give others respect, and you are to keep your personal issues out of it.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Uhh, huh, ho... oooh my God, you are ridiculous!Michael ScottOpen quote: Do not talk to me that way! I am your boss and I may someday be your father, so get out.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: You are never going to be my father, you get out!Michael ScottOpen quote: I hope that you are willing to die in this office, because I am...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Me too...
Scene 217 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: Hey. (walks up to Oscar and hands him a report to sign)Oscar MartinezOpen quote: Hey.Angela MartinOpen quote: (in a sing-songy voice) Pam, how's your day going?Oscar MartinezOpen quote: Pam, just for the record, I think you're overreacting a little bit, your mom's old enough to make her own decisions.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh, well, thanks Oscar. I was just wondering how would you feel if Michael was sleeping with your mom?Oscar MartinezOpen quote: My mother's in a wheelchair.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Well, he could still... I'm sorry about that... Oh could I just get you to sign this second page.
Scene 2221 linesKelly KapoorOpen quote: (Dwight listening in his ear piece) Ryan, I have to ask you a personal question. Do you think that I should get a Fedora?Ryan HowardOpen quote: Ahh, I don't think so, no...Kelly KapoorOpen quote: Well, I think I'd look really hot in one. Where'd you get your fedora?Ryan HowardOpen quote: I'd rather not say.Kelly KapoorOpen quote: I think I'm gonna get the same fedora as you.Erin HannonOpen quote: Hi Dwight!Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (Dwight storms through the break room listening to Kelly and Ryan in his ear piece) Shh!Ryan HowardOpen quote: (Ryan and Kelly talking) ...it should go with the persona you already have.Kelly KapoorOpen quote: Well, I think I have that persona.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Where did you get that mallard?Kelly KapoorOpen quote: What the hell is a mallard?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: That!Kelly KapoorOpen quote: Oh, Professor Damien D. Duck, Jim gave him to me.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Okay, I gave that to him that as a gift, I'm taking that back.Kelly KapoorOpen quote: If you take it back, I'll scream.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (sighs heavily) I'll give you five bucks for it.Ryan HowardOpen quote: Twenty.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Ten.Ryan HowardOpen quote: Deal. (pays Ryan and takes the mallard back)Kelly KapoorOpen quote: (to Ryan) You're so cool.Ryan HowardOpen quote: This reminds me, you owe me three bucks for gas.
Scene 2314 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: (walks into Toby's office) Hey Toby, could I talk to you for a minute?Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Yeah, sure, what's up?Michael ScottOpen quote: Um, I just wanted to apologize for taking that tone with you earlier that was... uncalled for, I'm sorry.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Um, yeah, ah, ah, that means a lot. Thank you for saying it.Michael ScottOpen quote: Can I sit down for a second?Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Yeah, er... pull up a chair or sit on the shredder.Michael ScottOpen quote: This is gonna sound weird, but I think I may be the victim of a hostile work environment with this whole Pam situation.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Ah, you should probably deal with that outside of the work place.Michael ScottOpen quote: She brought it into the work place so I feel like it has to be dealt with here.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Ok, I mean, I could talk to her.Michael ScottOpen quote: Really? Would you do that?Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Yeah... that's why they pay me the big bucks. (both laugh)Michael ScottOpen quote: (hugs Toby, who smiles big) You're a good, good guy.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: I'm good...
Scene 241 lineToby FlendersonOpen quote: You know, I always knew if Michael just took the time to get to know me, we'd become friends.
Scene 2528 linesToby FlendersonOpen quote: (walks up to Pam's desk with a binder) Hey Pam, could I talk to you for a sec?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Sure, what's up?Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Well, I was hoping that maybe in light of everything that's happened today, it would be a good idea if today, you, me, and Michael could head into the conference room for some conflict resolution.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (to Michael) What's the matter, you can't fight your own battles?Michael ScottOpen quote: No... that's...Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Maybe you could just take the rest of the day off... you know...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (to Michael) Oh, would that make you feel better?Michael ScottOpen quote: I don't... um... I can't hear your conversation.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: You can tell Michael that I'm not leaving.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: (gets up and puts a hand on Michael's shoulder) Buddy, I think that...Michael ScottOpen quote: Yeah, yeah, yeah-okay... you're a jackass. (to Pam) Hey, hey, you know what? You're just as stubborn as your mother, when you don't wanna do something you just don't do it.Stanley HudsonOpen quote: Heh, heh, heh.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Michael, you're just her rebound!Michael ScottOpen quote: You were right Jim, shoulda listened to you, should never have told her.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (to Jim) What! You knew?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Barely, I... I don't have all the facts. Frank and Bean...Michael ScottOpen quote: (Pam storms into break room) Okay, do you want me to stop seeing your mom? Is that how we're gonna get past this? Cause, I will.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Mmmmm, yes!Michael ScottOpen quote: Well, that is not gonna happen!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Then why'd you even offer!?Michael ScottOpen quote: Because I assumed that you want me to be happy because I want you to be happy.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Michael, let me make this very easy for you, I could give a sh(beep) about your happiness! Stop dating my mother!Michael ScottOpen quote: You know what? I'm gonna start dating her even harder.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: What's that supposed to mean?Michael ScottOpen quote: You know what it means.Jim HalpertOpen quote: (Pam storms out of the break room) Hey...Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Shut it!Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yep...
Scene 261 lineMichael ScottOpen quote: I don't need to be friends with Pam. I have plenty of female friends. My mom, Pam's mom, my aunt... although she just blocked me on IM, what's her face from Quiznos, I see her four times a week.
Scene 2712 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: (walks into his office and sees the mallard back on his desk) Dwight, you brought the mallard back.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Well, I had to, I mean... Kelly was not even...Jim HalpertOpen quote: (speaking into the mallard and looking a Dwight) Hi buddy.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (walks into Jim's office and takes out ear piece) I'm sorry.Jim HalpertOpen quote: A wooden duck?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Mallard. I put it in your office in order to surveil you. I was jealous that you got the promotion over me.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Okay, just to be clear, you're terrible at this and you are not equipped for espionage...Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Oh, I'm equipped... I can...Jim HalpertOpen quote: Silence.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Don't tell Michael...Jim HalpertOpen quote: I won't. But, you will wash and buff our car.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Punishment fits the crime, I accept. (shakes Jim's hand and leaves)
Scene 283 linesMichael ScottOpen quote: (leaving his office with his rum) Night everyone. Night Pam, thanks again for the rum.Erin HannonOpen quote: Night Michael.Michael ScottOpen quote: Night Erin.
Scene 2911 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: (in the conference room) Hey Pam, can I see you for a second? So, Dwight heard you were having a really rough day. So he generously offered to wash our car.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: (looking out the window at Dwight washing the car) Awww, he did that for me?Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes, he did. You know what was nice, nights swimming in Bayou bay.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Mmmm.Jim HalpertOpen quote: (Michael is seen debating on whether to come back in to the office) Remember that older couple whose kids were also named Jim and Pam?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Haha, yeah. Say more nice things.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Well, we went on a Segway tour and we're awesome at it and Frank and Beans!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Maybe I'm overreacting.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yeah... maybe.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: But I don't think I am.Jim HalpertOpen quote: You're not, nope. Nope.
Scene 302 linesKevin MaloneOpen quote: (Ryan is walking out of the office ahead of him) Oh... where'd you get that hat?Ryan HowardOpen quote: I'd rather not say.
Scene 311 lineDwight SchruteOpen quote: (walks into Jims office, twists the top of the pen that he placed in Jim's pen holder which has a bug in it, pushes play) (Jim's voice) "We have our high quality 28 pound bond, our heavier 38 pound bond, or our..." (pauses recording) I've got eight hours of this. Of course I wanted Jim to find the mallard, make him feel safe. Did you really think I would put my primary listening device in a wooden mallard? I'm not insane. (starts the recording again) "...65 pound cover stock, which is the heaviest paper that will still feed smoothly through your desktop printer."