Scene 016 linesErin HannonOpen quote: Oh. Hey, champions.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Good morning.Clark GreenOpen quote: Quater finals in an hour. Hope you got some sleep cause I am going to be haunting your nightmares tonight.Erin HannonOpen quote: I did. I got some really good sleep.Clark GreenOpen quote: Did you? (pushes pencil cup at Erin)Erin HannonOpen quote: (grabs pencils out of cup quickly as cup falls) Bzzz.
Scene 021 lineDwight SchruteOpen quote: Yesterday was the first round of a branch wide paper airplane contest. It was being sponsored by Weyer-Hammer Paper in an effort to get us to sell more of their new product Airstream Deluxe A4, the Cadillac of paper. It's not so easy on the environment, if you know what I mean. (whispers) Practically made of plastic.
Scene 031 lineNellie BertramOpen quote: We started with sixteen brave aviators. Some use skill (cut to Kevin flying paper airplane), others relied on showmanship (cut to Dwight throwing airplane at Nate with an apple on his head) others seem not to comprehend what a paper airplane is. (cut to Creed throwing a melon) And of course, there was the odd moment of heartbreak and disaster.
Scene 045 linesToby FlendersonOpen quote: Hey I left my glasses down here somewhere. Crossing through, beep beep. (Pam's plane hit Toby in the eye)Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Ow! Ow!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: I didn't see you! You should have yelled “Crossing!”Toby FlendersonOpen quote: (crying) I'm sorry!Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Ok, so is that my spot?
Scene 063 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: (Reading from script) Be careful of that beaker, it contains dangerous acid!Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: It does not say dangerous. And there's no exclamation point.Andy BernardOpen quote: Well I'm just trying to bring some life to it.
Scene 071 lineAndy BernardOpen quote: Last week I got an agent and uh, this week I got a movie. HRPDC chemical handling protocols. It's gonna be seen by tons of workers in the industrial chemical community. One of whom could have a cousin whose brother's Brad Pitt. And boom, next thing you know, I'm in Moneyballs Two.
Scene 0810 linesToby FlendersonOpen quote: Andy?Andy BernardOpen quote: Go away, we're running lines.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: You wanted to see the gooey eye.Andy BernardOpen quote: Oh yeah. Alright, get over here. I am so freaked out by things going into eyes. I just- wow. (moves to lift Toby's eye patch) Uggggh! I can't even, I'm so freaked out by that, just go. Go go go go go.Toby FlendersonOpen quote: Alright, it's getting gooier so we'll just do it later.Andy BernardOpen quote: Yeah, Ok. (Closes door) Alright. Where were we?Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: Something full of acid.Andy BernardOpen quote: And remember: Do not attempt to extinguish a chemical fire with water. You will only exacerbate the flame. The dangerous flame.Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: (claps) That was great man. Alright, I'm out of here.Andy BernardOpen quote: W-w-w-wait. Stop stop stop. Don't go anywhere. I just need to find more colors. Let's do it six more times.
Scene 092 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: Hey. I just wanted to say that you woke up early with the kids and let me sleep and I really appreciate that.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Thank you. I appreciate that you appreciate that.
Scene 108 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: So, we had couple's therapy.Jim HalpertOpen quote: No shame in that. Get it all out in the open.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: And we have homework.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Yes, we are supposed to look for every chance to acknowledge and appreciate each other's sacrifices. Because I need to appreciate what Pam's been doing to run the house while I'm in Philly.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: And we're also supposed to speak our truths.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Mmhm.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Because if I had spoken my truth sooner about not wanting to move to Philly, then maybe we wouldn't have had this opportunity for couple's therapy.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Oh, we're supposed to call everything we don't want to do “opportunities.”
Scene 1119 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: Heads up everyone. If you really need something from me today, let's get it done tomorrow. Carla Fern got me a gig.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Hey!Andy BernardOpen quote: Yeah.Stanley HudsonOpen quote: Who's Carla Fern?Andy BernardOpen quote: Who is Carla Fern? Well, wow. Uh, she's my agent and my drill sargent. And one of my best friends. Oh, and Oscar, I already figured it out. If I have to get emotional in the film, I'm just going to think about you getting dumped by the Senator.Oscar MartinezOpen quote: Why wouldn't you use your own life? Erin just dumped you.Andy BernardOpen quote: Little raw. Not cool Oscar.Oscar MartinezOpen quote: But you just!Andy BernardOpen quote: Not cool.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Hey. Day two. Drama in the warehouse skies. This is Robert from Weyer-Hammer Paper, who will be joining us to judge the final rounds.Robert CaliforniaOpen quote: Who's pumped for the quarter finals, huh?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: I'm pumped!Erin HannonOpen quote: Clark's a dead man.Robert CaliforniaOpen quote: Alright. Sounds like somebody wants to walk away with this. (holds up large check for $2,000)Angela MartinOpen quote: Oh my god!GroupOpen quote: Whoa.Angela MartinOpen quote: Nellie you didn't tell us we could win money.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Oh yes I did, I told you all. It was..um, cause that's an awful lot of money for me to forget.Stanley HudsonOpen quote: Not one of us remembers you saying anything about two thousand dollars.
Scene 121 lineNellie BertramOpen quote: I forgot. I completely forgot. But at least now that large piece of cardboard that man was carrying around makes sense.
Scene 132 linesErin HannonOpen quote: Nellie, this is a competition. Please take it seriously.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Oh please. (Dwight watches Angela folding paper airplane)
Scene 141 lineAngela MartinOpen quote: Me? Oh, I'm fine. I mean, sure, times are leaner now that I'm separated from the Senator. But my new studio apartment is just fine (camera shows small cluttered space with excessive cats and Phillip crying) for me.. and Phillip... and Tinky... and Crinklepuss, and Bandit 2, and Pawlick Baggins, and Lady Aragorn and their 10 kittens.
Scene 161 lineAngela MartinOpen quote: I had a chance with Dwight, but I didn't take it. And if I went back now, when I'm broke and he just inherited a farm, I'd be one of those gold-digging tramps you read about that try to bag a farmer.
Scene 171 lineDwight SchruteOpen quote: I offered myself to Angela and she turned me down. If she changes her mind, the next move is hers. I'm with Esther now. She's younger than Angela, sturdier, more comfortable with the scent of a manured field. Let's be honest. When it came to manured fields, Angela was at best indifferent.
Scene 182 linesClark GreenOpen quote: Oh, wide wings, interesting.Erin HannonOpen quote: Hey. Why don't you back off?(looks at Pete)...I mean best of luck to you in the competition.
Scene 191 lineErin HannonOpen quote: Growing up in an orphanage, you have to fight other kids. For everything. Snacks, pillows, parents. I'm kinda worried about Pete seeing that side of me. I once ripped greedy Susan's pigtail right off her head. Just for a handful of Crispix.
Scene 205 linesCarla FernOpen quote: Are you in that paper documentary too?Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: Yep.Carla FernOpen quote: Do you need an agent?Andy BernardOpen quote: No. He's- I mean, you've never acted in anything before. He's just my entourage.Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: I was in The Whiz in high school.
Scene 212 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: That's the cleaky clacker! He clicks that and then the guy says “action.”Carla FernOpen quote: Hey, I made them get you a chair. All my clients sit.
Scene 226 linesWomanOpen quote: Can I take your picture?Andy BernardOpen quote: I guess it's starting. Um, yeah. Of course. Yeah sure. Tell you what. I'll put my arm around you and then I can take it-WomanOpen quote: We just need a picture of the top of your head in case we burn some of your hair off.Andy BernardOpen quote: Got it. (lowers head to show hair, but keeps looking up just as she tries to take the picture)WomanOpen quote: No, if you could just keep it down until..Andy BernardOpen quote: Sorry.
Scene 2314 linesNellie BertramOpen quote: OK, next up we have two creatures great and small. Kevin versus Angela.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Yes!Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Hey, that is a really nice plane. You make that yourself?Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Uh huh.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Well, what am I thinking? Of course you made that yourself. Cause it's in the rules that you have to fold your own plane.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Of course.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Kevin, did you make that yourself?Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Yes. In a way. From one that I bought on Craigslist.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Oh man.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: I call for a refold!Kevin MaloneOpen quote: No.Angela MartinOpen quote: Really? (to Dwight) Thank you.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: This is flatter.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: It's a piece of paper. You fold it into an airplane.
Scene 247 linesNellie BertramOpen quote: Ok, that's enough. This is the end of the ring now. You have to pick one.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: I can't. I love them all too much. And, none of them fly. So that makes it harder.Nellie BertramOpen quote: You have to choose one now.Kevin MaloneOpen quote: Fine. (throws plane, doesn't fly)Nellie BertramOpen quote: Angela advances.Erin HannonOpen quote: Nice.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (clapping) Whoo!
Scene 261 lineKevin MaloneOpen quote: I'm not giving up. I'm going to keep making planes until one of them flies. Like Wilbur and Orville Redenbacher.
Scene 274 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: An Earl Grey tea for the lady.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh, thank you. I acknowledge and appreciate that you went out of your way to get me tea.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Thank you. I like being appreciated. But, to speak my truth, it wasn't out of the way because I felt like a tea anyway. So, one trip.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Well, to speak my truth, I switched to coffee in March. There's a new espresso machine. But I still acknowledge and appreciate the gesture.
Scene 2812 linesDirectorOpen quote: We are rolling and...action!Andy BernardOpen quote: (Happily) This video is to demonstrate the HPRDC chemical handling protocols. These protocols could save you from severe injury, even death.ProducerOpen quote: Ok, um, stop. Um, why are you smiling so much?Andy BernardOpen quote: Just made a character choice to be a scientist who really likes what he does and enjoys his job.DirectorOpen quote: Ok, well maybe no smiling on this one.Andy BernardOpen quote: So how do you want, how should I do it?DirectorOpen quote: I don't know, just like you're reporting the news or something. Ok?Andy BernardOpen quote: (ridiculous news voice) This video is to demonstrate the HPRDC chemical handling protocols.DirectorOpen quote: Ok.Andy BernardOpen quote: It's Tom Brokaw, it's a newscaster.DirectorOpen quote: Who was that?Andy BernardOpen quote: Tom Brokaw!
Scene 2910 linesDwight SchruteOpen quote: Come on Clark!Angela MartinOpen quote: Come on Clark. (Clark throws plane, Erin throws plane it goes much farther)Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Whoa!Erin HannonOpen quote: Yeah! Oh! Eat it piggy! Eat it! Oink oink oink oink!Clark GreenOpen quote: We've still gotta work together, so we should keep it civil.Erin HannonOpen quote: (Snorts and grunts) I can't hear what you said. (snorting, grunting) You got your slop? (Squeals)Clark GreenOpen quote: You know what, this is completely unnecessary. You already won...Pete MillerOpen quote: Erin! Erin! Just stop.Erin HannonOpen quote: What?Pete MillerOpen quote: Relax.
Scene 3016 linesNellie BertramOpen quote: Next up we have Dwight and Phyllis.Bob Vance & Vance RefrigerationOpen quote: You can do it baby!Angela MartinOpen quote: No you can't baby! (to Dwight, whispers) Good luck.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Watch and learn.Erin HannonOpen quote: Wow.GroupOpen quote: Oh!Nellie BertramOpen quote: Dwight defeats Phyllis, Dwight you are through to the semi-finals.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Yes!Angela MartinOpen quote: Whoo!Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Oh, Esther.EstherOpen quote: Hey.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: What are you- (Esther kisses him) You're here early.EstherOpen quote: Yeah, I plucked the chickens extra fast cause I knew I was seeing you tonight. There might just be a little feather in your nuggets or a little bit of meat inside of your pillow.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: I like a little feather in my nuggets. (both laugh)Nellie BertramOpen quote: Alright ladies and gentlemen, we are down to the final four. Dwight, Erin, Angela and god only knows how, but Toby. One of you will walk away with two thousand dollars.Erin HannonOpen quote: Yeah!
Scene 3110 linesDirectorOpen quote: Ok here you have just knocked over the beaker, the chemicals splashed in your eye.Andy BernardOpen quote: Which is insanely painful.DirectorOpen quote: Yeah.Andy BernardOpen quote: And I've already picked a few childhood memories to tap in to, to really express that pain.DirectorOpen quote: That's great. So what you're gonna do then is come over here to the eye washing station and then just kinda flush out your eyes. You know, get the chemicals out. Alright?Andy BernardOpen quote: So I just lean over this thing and then you'll add the water special effect later?DirectorOpen quote: What water special effect?ProducerOpen quote: Yeah, yeah just hold your lids open with one hand and let the stream bathe your eyeballs.Andy BernardOpen quote: I'm not comfortable doing my own stunts. I'll get nude if you want me to, I'll go full Lena Dunham but I-DirectorOpen quote: Dude, we don't need you to go nude, OK? So just do the eyewash, Ok? That's all we're asking.
Scene 327 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: Darryl, what do I do?Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: Hold up, I'm looking at my spit with a microscope.Andy BernardOpen quote: They want me to use real water in the eye wash scene.Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: So?Andy BernardOpen quote: I can't squirt stuff in my eyeball. I've never even used an eye dropper.Production AssistantOpen quote: So Andy, so you know how to use this. You step on the pedal, water squirts in your eyes.Andy BernardOpen quote: Carla! Carla!
Scene 339 linesNellie BertramOpen quote: It is time for a little T & A. I give you: Toby and Angela.Angela MartinOpen quote: (throws plane far) Oh my god! Oh my god. Ok it's your turn. [Toby crumples plane and steps aside.Nellie BertramOpen quote: Well, Angela is the winner.Angela MartinOpen quote: Yes!EstherOpen quote: (to Dwight) Is there a reason that we're excited for that little woman?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Yes. I pity her. She was recently in a situation where she could have had it all, and instead she lost everything.EstherOpen quote: Oh. Is she a gambler?Dwight SchruteOpen quote: In a way. But not in a stand up and cheer kind of way, like the song.EstherOpen quote: Hmm. That is sad.
Scene 344 linesCarla FernOpen quote: (grabs Andy by the cheeks) Andy! If you don't stick your eyes in that machine, I'm going to call every production in North Eastern Pennsylvania. You won't even make an appearance on a security camera! (Andy starts to cry)ProducerOpen quote: What's the hold up here?DirectorOpen quote: The actor's crying.ProducerOpen quote: Oh god.
Scene 354 linesAndy BernardOpen quote: She yelled at me. I can't wash my eyeball. I can't do that. I can't.Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: Andy Bernard can't squirt water in his eye and act like it doesn't freak him out. But you know who can? Older Male Lab Assistant Number One.Andy BernardOpen quote: Do you believe in me?Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: I believe I want to go home.
Scene 366 linesDwight SchruteOpen quote: (throws plane far) Yeah! Ok! Beat that! (Erin throws plane, loses, Dwight laughs) Whoo! Ok.Erin HannonOpen quote: Dammit! Dammit, god. (To Pete) Sorry. Yeah I'm fine. I'm fine. I got mad. Cause I don't like losing. I'm just gonna- Sorry I'm mad! I'm mad, I’m really mad. I wanted to win. We were gonna win a lot of money, I was gonna buy you a sweater. It's stupid. Just the whole contest is stupid. That's how it feels.Pete MillerOpen quote: Yeah. (Erin kicks box) Whoa!Erin HannonOpen quote: Sorry I'm mad! I don't like losing! I thought I was going to win!Pete MillerOpen quote: Ok (tries to help her) Hey hey hey, whoa.Erin HannonOpen quote: Sorry. Sorry. I'm going to go upstairs and just...
Scene 3712 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: Oh, I made us a date to take my mom out to dinner to thank her for all that extra babysitting.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Well, you know how much I appreciate the opportunity to hang out with your mom more. So let me just put this in my calendar.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: I acknowledge with gratitude that you are being kind and responsible enough to include it in your calendar.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Thank you. Your mom is a treasure.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Well, I appreciate that some opportunities can be unpleasant- (Jim's phone rings, he answers)Jim HalpertOpen quote: Hey that's work, hold on. Hey Wade, did Cole Hamels call back or what? Great. Good.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Uh, to speak my truth, I'd appreciate if you hung that up cause we were in the middle of a conversation. (Jim hangs up phone) I appreciate the sacrifice.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Ok to speak my truth, that was a little sarcastic. I think that's a little unfair.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Really? I've been putting the kids to bed by myself every night for a months. And you had to miss one phone call. Is that your truth, Jim? That's really your truth?Jim HalpertOpen quote: I guess I will swallow my truth.Clark GreenOpen quote: Are you guys high? Because if so, to speak my truth, I would appreciate the sacrifice of including me in some hits off your kind buds.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: We're not high.
Scene 381 linePam BeeslyOpen quote: I wish we'd started this exercise six months ago. My heart just feels so... blocked up.
Scene 391 lineKevin MaloneOpen quote: The Mark 47 is ready for launch. (throws plane but it sticks to his hand) Less paste.
Scene 4011 linesDirectorOpen quote: Here we go. Rolling and... action!Andy BernardOpen quote: (doing eyewash) AHHH! AHHH! AHHH! AHHH!!DirectorOpen quote: And cut. We can fix the sound in post.ProducerOpen quote: Yeah.Andy BernardOpen quote: I can do a better one.ProducerOpen quote: That's fine, we'll move on.Andy BernardOpen quote: I said I can do a better one. Darryl...Darryl PhilbinOpen quote: Action!Andy BernardOpen quote: (eyewashes again) AHH! AHH! AHH!Carla FernOpen quote: Kid can act!Andy BernardOpen quote: Yeah! Yeah.
Scene 4111 linesNellie BertramOpen quote: Each contestant will throw two aeroplanes.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: After you.Angela MartinOpen quote: Thank you. (plane loops up and falls at her feet) Oh god!Nellie BertramOpen quote: Angela's first throw, terrible. Dwight.Dwight SchruteOpen quote: (fake throws and drops plane) Oh! Oh man! It slipped out of my hand, what a whiff. Ah, how'd that happen? God. (Angela smiles)EstherOpen quote: We want you to win. Dwight told me about your situation. It's such a pity. Use the money wisely. (Angela looks disgusted)Dwight SchruteOpen quote: Alright.Angela MartinOpen quote: Don't you dare tank this. (Dwight throws plane far, Angela fake throws and drops her plane)Nellie BertramOpen quote: And we have a winner. And it's Dwight. And it is everyone because this is over.Creed BrattonOpen quote: Two grand huh? I know a guy who can turn that into eight hundred dollars. And it's me.Angela MartinOpen quote: (To Esther) Well, I guess you needed the money more than me huh? Use it wisely.
Scene 421 lineAngela MartinOpen quote: I was disappointed in Dwight today. He showed a weakness that was unbecoming. Even if he did do it for me. I don't need pity and I don't need charity. I have my dignity and that's enough. And as long as I have that, I'll be ok.
Scene 432 linesJim HalpertOpen quote: I know this was really weird, and it was really hard. But I think we're making progress. So I'm really sorry that I have to go but let's keep at this. Ok?Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Ok. (intense moment where Jim leaves and Pam seems conflicted. She notices his umbrella and runs out to follow him)
Scene 446 linesPam BeeslyOpen quote: Jim! (hands him umbrella)Jim HalpertOpen quote: Thanks.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Alright, have a good trip.Jim HalpertOpen quote: Bye.Pam BeeslyOpen quote: Bye. (walks away)Jim HalpertOpen quote: Hey! (Runs after her and looks into her eyes) I... (hugs her tightly, Pam doesn't hug back)
Scene 451 linePastorOpen quote: (Flashback to Jim & Pam's wedding) Love suffers long and is kind. It is not proud. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. (Pam hugs Jim back finally) And now these three remain: Faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (Pam kisses Jim)